Have We Got it All Wrong?
We are in such rush to cope-up with new trends that we more often than not, forget to nurture what we learnt as we grew from childhood to youth, and then entered into a world of professions. Allow me to be very blunt on the fact that your grounding decides your future and not your silo upskilling. By grounding I refer to the core values you have imbibed as a child, youth and now as a young professional. If you work against your initial twenty-five years of learning to accommodate modern lifestyles, I may wish to bet that you are not very comfortable spending your weekends! As an HR Leader who has naturally come from the rungs in this profession, and specially when I interview young professionals, I try to focus on the candidates’ grounding. Let me assure you, if you express anything which does not go with your upbringing, your posturing tells me the story. Many of you reading this article may pre-judge me as a student from the old school. However, as much as I may wish to agree with you, nothing undermines the fact that schools and institutions which lay your foundation in life have not changed a lot. Teachers and academicians would still tell you the old age adage –“What you can learn at the age of nine cannot be taught to you at ninety-nine”.
Try to plan to build a home rather than buy many houses!!
Well then, what is this RUSH all about? Why do we often tend to display behaviour that is not inline with our core beliefs and value settings? Who or what is incentivizing you to forget your roots and adapt a way of life which you were not prepared for or could naturally not adapt to. We often play the victim card and passon the blame to external factors or reasons. Let me tell you once again, it is YOU who decides the way forward either to give-in to avoidable convenience/fragile social expectations status & standing/unnatural desire to realize gratuity before time/over-exercising human attributes which evolve only with age and experience and many. Or, to let your life and experiences evolve naturally whereby you wish to live a life of contentment along side fulfilment it is you who would ultimately define the words contentment and fulfilment. These are words which are relative and not measurable and for sure defers from person to person. Being realistic is not a boring agenda but rather a great ingredient for good health and waves of happiness. You are not in competition with anyone but yourself if you believe this, then doing better everyday as little as an inch will add-up to miles of success over years!
Remember the time when you were by yourself and not sure about your career ahead? I am not talking about any privileged section of our society but about individuals like me whose parents poured whatever resource they could in their humble capacities to secure a place for their child in the evolving world, where differentiation was a constant dynamic filter or a gate-pass to decide who would reign the future and who would be the ones to serve the masters. At this point in time, you have realized which way your evolution has chosen to provide you with your current situation and I bet the realization is mostly outcomes which depict a northward trend. That is what is supposed to be the way ahead naturally, when you follow any evolution. It is only dangerous if you inject artificial catalysts to achieve an outcome opposed to the natural one. Having supported the HR function for a Global Top 10 Information Technology company and in general the tech industry for the last 16 years, I have most often realized over interactions with many individuals (a million of them till now), that more so often job satisfaction and a sense of work-life balance has been the top two 'Have Nots' in the list which in parallel reflect so many 'Haves'. However, when asked to weighin on their overall satisfaction with life in general, the have nots weigh-in 10X times more than what they have been able to achieve (some naturally and many to copeup with some virtual sense of expectation set by some virtual entities who never lived life alongside you).
In a world which is unfair (as the default factory setting), you would be able to be the change agent only if you work along with your natural upbringing, values, culture, and experiences. Change is what we all desire but only those who do not fall victim to RUSH stand a better chance to lead such change. On the other hand, we should also realize that everyone cannot be a leader for reasons of personal preference and attributes. However, it is important that you invest yourself in an area of natural nurturing (i.e., your profession) and stay invested for a logical period to realize the benefits of blooming. Often the haste/hurry/rush comes in the way of natural evolution and what we receive are bonsais of what could have become a significant natural growth. The market for true potential was always there and will remain to stay if you make that right decision to stay focused on an evolving realization and fulfilment of your growth goals.
Bottom-line, believe in your self and your experiences of growing from childhood to a stage where you are in your professional lives. Do not compare yourself with others since experiences are widely varied based on personal circumstances. There is no need to fulfil expectations of everyone and specially ones those who do not invest in you or do not stand-by you at all times. It is rather easy to follow the herd as opposed to follow your heart and mind. Decide which strategy works for you and move along. Remember, it takes time for a seed to develop into a giant tree howsoever you feed the soil with manures to speed the growth process growth itself is relative and evaluated by various standards and parameters of our society and hence be self-contained with results of your efforts. Time is the most expensive ingredient in your plan to grow as a professional and hence be careful on what you are cooking for your future less heat or over heating both may spoil the outcome (i.e., being impractical). This is the same as perfect cooking to produce a dish you do not have a palate for, and which others will enjoy eating (trying to satisfy external expectations).
Try to plan to build a home rather than buy many houses!!
It takes time and values to build a home which provides far more satisfaction than buying houses, which gives momentary satisfaction to the extent of a few years post which you would be compelled to buy your next house. Homes built over years of investment and time and the interiors of which reflect on your values can potentially be built once in a lifetime but weighs-in much when it comes to one’s natural sense of fulfilment. Take a pause and introspect on what you read in this article so far. Ask yourself some direct questions to clarify your purpose and direction and if you truly feel for change of course, it is time now to start working afresh without any fear of the future. For some, the course correction might be easier to adapt to and for some it may entail some significant re-engineering. Whatever be your situation, you will win at the end of the day and let’s get it right this time around!